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This Week’s Quote
What have you been doing right lately?
I am a stay at home mom. When the boys were first born, I remember being asked by their pediatrician, “What do you do?” I found myself responding, “I’m a teacher. I teach preschool.” It was my second nature response. It was my identity. For so long that was my response, I am a teacher. I quickly corrected myself, I was a teacher but I chose to take sometime away from my job as a teacher to be a stay at home mom.
I can honestly say that making the choice and deciding to be a mom who does not work outside the home, was one of the best decisions I had ever made. That’s not to say my days are easy. No days are easy in motherhood, whether you work or stay home. Motherhood, life, is messy.
But deciding to be a stay at home mom is something I have done RIGHT lately.
I’ve learned a few things along this stay at home mom journey so far. I thought I would share with you a few tips for how to enjoy being a stay at home mom…
Find Something for You
What is something that you love? That gives you a little extra? Something besides being a mama. Something that feels RIGHT. For me it is this blog. While it is a struggle to find the time, to make the time, I am always happy when I do. Because when I do, I feel refreshed and happy and proud.
Get Ready for the Day
While it can be so easy to throw your hair up in a pony tail and stay in the same pajamas you slept in, I assure you it will feel better to shower, get dressed, and yes even put some makeup on. Now I know this might not be realistic every day, but try. And don’t do it for anyone but you. Not your friend, not your husband, not your children. For you. Blow your hair dry, throw on some mascara, maybe a little blush, take a deep breath and be proud that you got ready for the day.
Get Out There
Do something fun outside of the house with your children. Something together! The boys and I take swim classes each week… well, the boys are the ones learning to swim, but Matt and I get in the pool with them. Just to clarify, I do know how to swim! Our swim lessons are something we all look forward to each week. So Mama, get out there. It doesn’t need to be that organized as taking a class or lesson together. You could go to story time at a local library or go to the zoo. Join a playgroup. Anything! I am a firm believer in getting out of the house, it makes EVERYONE happier, makes everyone feel right. I am also a firm believer in making memories together. Memories that your child will have with YOU in them!
Find Mom Friends like You
Motherhood is hard, you need a village. It helps if at least part of that village is of moms who think like you; who share you thoughts on parenting. It helps to be able to have mom friends to bounce ideas off of, to ask for help or suggestions. Trust me, find your like-minded village and hang on to them!
Embrace the Mess
I wrote a whole post about my struggle with this, you can read it here. This was a harder one for me to grasp, but boy is it an important one. Because at more than one point in time, I can guarantee life will be messy, and guess what? That is ok. It is right for things to be messy. There is no such thing as perfect; you’re not the perfect mom, you don’t have the perfect, clean, tidy house, dinner is gourmet, looking like Curtis Stone prepared it himself. Maybe it will. And kudos to you. But maybe it won’t, and kudos to you too.
Or beer, or whiskey, or eat some ice cream, or get a pedicure. Wine is my reward at the end of a day. What’s yours? Because after a long day of changing diapers, picking up the same toys no less than 35 times, making breakfast, lunch, and dinner, attempting to get a workout in, maybe paying a bill or two, giving baths, hugging, kissing, and loving your babies…. trust me you deserve a glass of wine, a shot of whiskey… or maybe two!
Look at Your Children
And I truly mean look; physically look at them, stare at them! Memorize their chubby cheeks, their perfect nose, their little mouth, the way they scrunch their eyes when they smile. Ignore the dog fur on the floor, the dust bunnies need some friends anyway, and stare at your precious babies. As the play, as they sleep, as they sit quietly for those few minutes. Take those few minutes each day and just be in awe of them. This will make you feel right.
Remember Time Flies
The phrase time flies when you’re having fun has NEVER been more true in my life. I work hard to savor every moment; to take time to gawk and be in awe of my babies. But somehow, time still flies, somehow in the blink of an eye my babies are growing and changing and slowly not being baby babies anymore. So when you are struggling, when your day is particularly long or hard or tiring, ora all of the above… take a minute to remind yourself that what seems so long and hard and tiring will be over in the blink of an eye. Everything really is just a phase. So enjoy it!
Have I forgotten anything in my list of how to enjoy being a stay at home mom? Are you a stay at home mom? What do you do to feel right about it all?